Natural Fashion

it might be a record of sorts. the recent post in the New York TImes Why Can't Middle Age Women Have Long Hair by Dominique Browning- found 1256 comments stringing just beyond her last words 'The short of it is that long hair means there is always, at least, hope.' She started something.

This seems to be a habit with the writer- she is likely the most beloved editor of the woefully defunct House and Garden magazine, author of countless exceptional books and now a blog, entitled Slow Love Life- also the title of her latest book. That her list of credits is enviable-apparently, a lot of people are on the fence about her hair.

It is Long.
It is Gray.
It seems it is the combination that really flies in the face of what is proper for old-I say that with love-however- more mature sounds more-well, loving, so let's go with that.

The article caught my attention and as I finished its first reading my comment- To Self: That sounds about right, I will get there. At 55, the author has taken the plunge and let it fly -loud and proud. At 51, I'm not there yet-though my hair stays at about shoulder length for the last twenty years, in varying shades of brown, blonde, & yes-I swear, purple once. The purple-fained as RED, was not- RED-it was purple. So what is it like at the moment- RED, not purple- and it is just right- at the moment.

Yes, the maintenance is going to be hell- mind numbing. I finally found something like my idyllic childhood color. A distinct gray streak either side of the part has emerged overnight after about 1 month. I find myself pulling at the part pressing down-How much gray is there really? My Loved Ones swear they can't see a thing. Hum? After sending a photograph of the stunning Ines de la Fressange- as she recently appeared on the Chanel runway- to my longtime friend and stylist, we conferred in front of a full length mirror. In more or less these words she said:
You want to go red.
I: of course not.
:that has a great deal of red in it. At this point she could see I was backing down-
but this time-to my surprise, I didn't. Everyone that has noticed the RED, or I have prodded to notice says they like it- No- I think they Love it.

Dominque Browning thinks-rather knows-Men love long hair. They think it's sexy. (her words) She sites fictional literature and myth as her sources for this knowledge, and I am sure she is working from first hand experience as well. Now here we do part ways- I don't think this is quite accurate. Perhaps collectively MEN prefer it-it is fantasy. If their reality includes a well loved woman with a darling pixie cut- they would, or should, adamantly disagree. Since my own experience is lackluster- for few MEN In My PAST have offered a firm opinion-more the - I like it however you like it. Hum? Maybe that was a lie. Anyway- they are no longer PRESENT. Those MEN I do count on for reassurance- two older brothers and a nephew, offered their unique and for each-not surprising- comments.

Right after I went RED, I had dinner with one of my brothers. Standing beside him- I wait for the shock, the awe. He looks at me- then catches a glimpse of our mother, who just had her hair cut about an inch- and says, "Oh, look- Mom's had her hair done." (exact words) I was flabbergasted! Really. I Mean Flabbergasted.
I:"Kev! I can not believe you are standing right next to ME and my hair is RED & you didn't notice, how can that be possible, I can't believe it?" (all in one string of exclamations- just like that).
He: "Oh, You , did. It looks good." Just as he always has, in his smiling laughing kind of way. It is charming and diverting. We giggled like we did when we were best buddies.

Next brother- Paul, my oldest sibling , I just went right in for it:
"I dyed my hair, It's RED."
He: "I see that."
Lastly, from my 22 year old nephew, JT, born with sagacity in full, and Bless Him, He loves me just as Aunt Gaye-immediately He said:
"Yes, that's mostly how I remember your hair being." Of course- He is right. It was like saying welcome home, Aunt Gaye.

So how do you get to the point of putting chemical dyes on your head, scalp- permeating ? My niece, Liz at 27 has beautiful blonde hair - always has. This summer when she breezed into our family mountain gathering, her hair was noticeably more blonde.
Her question to her Gran and Me-"If you didn't know me, would you think it was natural?" Both, mother and I laughed, and then we all three laughed wildly. Her father-ever the diplomat,Paul, said when asked if he noticed, replied, "Why Yes, I didn't know if it was appropriate to comment on the change?" That is LOVE. I declare-these are the people that would not care if your hair was green- they LOVE you, so they LOVE your HAIR.

One of my favorite blogs to visit is Catherine's The Blushing Hostess Entertains, writes in Don't Bend
'be fearless. Cut if you want to, but not because social more's flattened your resolve to maintain it. And not because someone else prefers it another way. Do it because you want to see someone you recognize in the mirror. And because she is beautiful that way.' I agree with this lovely young woman. What I do struggle with it the maintenance, and it will only get worse. It IS Getting Worse. So will it stay long. My father's four aunts and grandmother all maintained very long hair throughout most of their lives. Shocked as a child, one day I found my MaMa out on a bench brushing the longest, grayest hair I had ever seen. Draping just along the ground, she always wore it in a neat coil-this machination performed by one of her four daughters-who always seemed to be just waiting to be called for the task. As my mother says:
"the Women of your father's family prefer long hair - I don't know why, but I guess you do too." Hum?
These same women have married often or never married-so I'm not sure if the Long Hair Gene really exists but it does seem to be Trend rather than Trait. That it will go Gray sooner rather than later is becoming obvious- my grandmother was prematurely gray-white as a matter of fact- and that was most becoming.
IF ONLY. That is likely to be my fate. I have no cause to believe my hair will ever co-operate with my desires as it is yet to do so.

I'm half way there. Fearless? OF that I can not be sure, however, it is nice to have something important to think about, to think of throwing caution to the wind.

MODEL HEADS

the fearless Dominique Browning

author